As i always say to myself strongly believing of my quote that " i am a clear image but not everyone can see me the way i want " and that means that i am who i am and i am something so easy to see but sometimes hard for people to look at clearly ..
I never cared about what everyone says i mean i care so much for the details but i hardly accept suggestions from strangers or people who dont know me very well .. i am so hard to be convinced from anyone and sometimes peoples opinions touch me and distract me but i can easly turn my face away ..
A lot of important supposed  to be role models surronding me like my parents but i never payed attention to them when i was very sure of what i want and how strongly i was believing in my   opinions and still i am .. WHY ? because when my parents didnt care much about having their perfect role and sticking up to it i wouldnt exchange my perfect role too .. i mean if i want to i can be the most perfect daughter on planet Yes i can because I am capable of it i am strong and confident so tough and i can handle a little behaving .. but whats thats supposed to do to them .. they dont deserve more from me they dont even deserve the unreal me because i am every familys dream thats what i keep hearing from everyone ..
But they never knew how valuable i was and am they just wanted to ruin me and push me to edges but i kept my silence because i knew they were gonna hurt me and i couldnt handle much more pain i couldnt .
I rejected myself standing up for my believes i may suggest them and work on them and i may seem strong from the outside as i showed them but i'm always hurt and broken from the inside but i never pushed so hard for my desires because it was hopelessly  impossible for me to always get what i want so i kept on my silence hiding what i feel inside knowing that these days are temporary and they will eventually fade because this is not My life forever I will eventually go to another life creating adorable babies and having the portrait i've always dreamed of ..
The life i wanted .
" it's not about the way live in life it's about who you are in this life "
-R*
 





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