I've growed up with the belive that parents are created to make a new life for their adorable kids ..
to colour it with the taste of love caring forgivness giving and even sharing .. after they create the life that they can get into responsibilities with it they have to stick to the rule that they're old not that young to be playing around as a teenager giving themselves ahead of their kids buying and having fun forgetting that they entered a gate of worries towards their babies .. i hate the feeling that my parents arent giving me this they raised me on the belive that i am responsible for everything i buy i get i act i say even what i do ..
i know i am now someone great because of how my brain acts and how my actions are well enough with my ways of thinking .. i never felt i'm young to play or to say i want or to have my wishes to commands i never had that feeling I am living with an old mind athough i am only 17 and a half but i was passing a day by another with being older and older i came up with fantasies and stories because of how hard i live .. i went to stores and places with fathers and mothers that are holding their 20s teenagers or less buying them giving holding and hugging them with the question " what do you want *smiles* " i cried nights and days for the missing feeling i've never had i know my life shouldn't be perfect but when i tell my parents about some of my thoughts and comments they always and forever reply " we dont need to do that you're old you have to be thankful for having parents some people dont have parents and there you are wishing for more you ungrateful daughter " and they continue with more aggressive rejections and reactions .. i know i am thankful but for the people who dont have parents they work on having ones and dream and the ones with parents they work for trading love and giving ..Thats the rule of life you are happy and thankful for what you have but you work and wish for more .. i am giving more that taking and i am sick because of it .. i am tired of caring and worrying about people and getting them out of their misere when i am the one with the miserable life but guess what i ask and worry but they never do ..i walk by and i see parents loving on their babies kissing them holding them and dreaming about their happy future making sacrifices and dying for their best ways of living because most of them feel that when they start creating a family they dont own a life of their own they have their kids world they surround it with tied up ribbons and decorate it in a beautiful way .. i can see the look on their eyes when they buy things for their kids or when they talk to them or when they hold them and smile and laugh at their faces how the shine is bright out of their eyes they couldn't hide the joy coming out of their hearts when they look at them I love how i can see a father holding his teenage daughter talking to her politly and whispering to her ear discussing issues and listening to her thoughts and the suggestions that she has he grabs her and leads her to the wishes she dreams of. when i talk to my mother she never found a way to listen to me she either dismiss me ignore my talks tell me that i am annoying making me uncomfortable to continue tell me that i am blabing or even shout at me making me cry i tried i really tried to start conversations with her she replies denying my thoughts shutting them off giving me no reasons to discuss even more she opens her mind with me complaining and when i reply she tells me it was a waste talking to me what is it with you mother when you started talking and wanted my opinion and i started making you feel better you totally slap me with hurtful ungrateful words .. i never tried talking to my dad he is not that kind he's never open and never easy to be satisfied so hard to be handled .
 


Jayde
09/20/2013 11:19pm

That is really good, I'm glad you are writing blogs :)

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09/21/2013 1:48am

Than you i am really grateful for ypu comment i hope you keep on reading my blog i would really really love the support :)

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